Svenson: the limits of emotional reserves

“If we string ourselves out, expending 100 percent of our time and energy, there is no way in which we can adjust to the unexpected emergency,” concludes Pastor Louis H. Evans, Jr. “We become defensive about our expended energies because there isn’t anything left to give. Having nothing in reserve, we tune out the need.”  


Each morning we rise to meet the day with a certain quantum of emotional energy. For some, this energy reservoir is huge, while for others it is nearly drained empty. Some are buoyant and resilient, filled with a zest and vitality that never seems to change. Others have their emotional chins on the ground and can’t remember what it feels like to smile. This quantum of emotional energy is not fixed but instead is in constant flux with the environment. We are always losing energy into the environment and receiving energy back again. Sometimes the reservoir is being drained, as when we are sad or angry. Other times the reservoir is being filled, perhaps by expressions of encouragement or activities successfully completed. No matter how large or small the quantum of emotional energy is at the start of the day, and no matter how fast or slow it is exchanging with the environment, one thing is certain: The amount within us is finite. No one has an infinite capacity for emotional discharge. When our reserves are depleted, they are depleted. If we make further withdrawals, pain will be felt.  


It is important to understand our emotional reserves. It is important to understand how much we have at the beginning of each day and which influences drain our emotions dry or recharge our batteries. It is important to learn what our limits are, and not to make further withdrawals if we are already maximally depleted. And it is important to respect these limits in others.

Margin (loc.1177-91)